Time for your best vegan recipes

A few weeks ago my mom went to an talk on the World Peace Diet which is basically vegan. That's all I know. But they guilted her about eating animals because the animals don't like being on a farm, don't like being milked... You get the idea. Which, if we stop eating cows, it's not like we're going to set them all free, they'll basically go extinct. Anyways, Mom didn't eat a lot of meat before this, but she's getting closer to the whole vegan thing.

At this point I'd like to point out it was me that first because a vegetarian. I was greeted with much protest in my house. And more than a few scoffs of "that'll last a week". Now, fifteen years later, I've managed to convert them.

So we always cook a Christmas Eve dinner for my aunt and uncle, and a Christmas brunch for the other side of the family. And now Mom wants it to be mildly vegan. No meat at least. And she's slightly nervous about cooking the dinner partly because she's studying for her PhD exam, but mostly because my aunt is like the pickiest eater ever, only disguised as someone who's not picky which is even harder. Basically any unusual ingredients, or mushrooms, are not acceptable. It's like Kelly trying to cook for her brother in law, Jenny trying to cook for Doug... fill in your person. We all know one like this.

I was looking through magazines and on the internet and found a few things. The real danger in vegetarian cooking is that people don't feel hungry again five minutes after eating because there has to be the right amount of protein in the meal. And, if you get your protein from plants, you need one third more than if you eat animal protein because of how our bodies break down food. Fascinating.

Today I went to Ikea and got more of those little black and tan boxes. Not that Black and Tan. These black and tan boxes. Ikea also had some other boxes in red but I couldn't decide how that would look. I mean it's red so it couldn't be that bad but I already had this whole theme going on, it didn't seem like I could just interject this new color. Although I did carry around those red boxes for a while thinking about them. I also got cute little jars for herbs and spices which I need because I buy those things in bulk and had a ridiculous stash of plastic bags in my pantry. I can see it now, "no, I swear, it's really oregano in that baggy. Honest." Not a conversation I ever want to have with anyone (especially your mom) so I'm happy with this solution. I also got a pair of green rubber dish gloves. Why? Heh heh.

And then I went to Target where I spent way too much money. In preparation for the Melcher Steal-a-thon, I got the fixins for my gift. I already had a nike shirt that gloriously reads (in gold glitter) "I feel pretty". After a shopping trip with Amanda, I found cute fuzzy mary jane slippers at Target (which you can't see on the internet at Target or Amazon, sorry, I just checked) so I bought those and an iTunes gift card. I'm going with a theme about being a pretty woman and relaxing and feeling comfy once all the houseworks is done. It's going to be cute. I hope a guy doesn't pick it out. I think I'll find wrapping paper with as much pink and purple as possible so it's clearly marked.